I own a Mac and I vote!

Have you seen those silly bumper stickers that say something like I smoke and I vote! They should add: Cough...gasp...wheeze...

Hmmm...I can only hazard a guess as to the message they're trying to send. I've seen other bumper stickers that say something like I own a gun and I vote!

Hmmm... okay. I think maybe I can guess the intent on that one. How 'bout the one I saw recently here in town: I'm low on estrogen and I carry a gun!

Now that's a pretty clear message.

Okay, my turn. If I had a similar bumper sticker it would say I own a Mac and I vote. In fact, it's October 27th and I already voted. Here are a few quick thoughts on both topics: My maverick Mac and the self-described maverick, Mc.

I bought my iBook G4 something like three or four years ago. I use the thing constantly, but I barely know how to use it. And that's why my next computer will be a Mac again--because you don't have to be an expert to use your computer. By contrast, if you're running a Windows-based machine, you are an expert. You have to be. To make an automotive analogy, I insouciantly drive around without any tools and without a spare tire. I don't change the oil or even buy gas. By contrast, the PC folks have to tow a trailer full of spare parts wherever they go because they're always breaking down!

There are numerous things I don't like about the Mac and its software; I'm not some kind of Mac disciple or anything. But the operating system just works. And unlike PC users, in the unlikely event that I ever do actually receive an error message, I'll read it and think about it. Actually, I'll probably get weak in the knees because I've never seen one. Ha! But by contrast, PC users have developed a Pavlovian response to ubiquitous, "meaningless" (you hope) error messages. They're like senseless pop-ups. You get the error message; there's disgust, annoyance, and a strong sense of deja vu. Then with trepidation in your soul but with little delay of your mouse, you click either 'OK' or 'CANCEL' with little comfort that you really know why the heck that meaningless message appeared in the first place. You just hope you haven't just nuked your PC.

Your PC: NOTE~ Your hard drive will now be erased by aliens from Mars.

OK or CANCEL?

You: Whatever...click.

Some day...poof. All that will be left is a puff of smoke and you'll have soot all over your face.

Just kidding. I hope.

So I chose the Mac for pragmatic reasons. I've saved approximately 72,000 hours that I would've otherwise spent troubleshooting a PC. Thank you, Mr. Jobs.

That's why I picked the Mac. Now let's talk about the other Mc, the "maverick" Mr. McCain. Chalk this upcoming loss to this headline: McCain snatches defeat from the jaws of victory!!!

Sorry, but I just couldn't bring myself to vote for him. I greatly admire what he did for us in Vietnam and I greatly appreciate his many years of service as an elected official, but he just doesn't strike me as stable enough for the job. And the way he has run his campaign...oy! If he had only stayed away from his incessant sophomoric negative attacks...if he had only kept to the high ground and stuck to telling us how he was going to save the world...if he only had kept his mouth shut instead of making up lyrics to that Beach Boys song...

Alas, he did not do those things and Sarah's just not ready to take over should the need arise.

What about B.O.? He'll likely win, but as much as I like Biden, I couldn't vote for Obama either. He hasn't done much good for anyone but himself so far. Ask his constituents about crime. Ask them about taxes. Ask them about anything else that matters to most of us and you'll not hear many glowing reports. He appears measured and thoughtful and presidential, though, so that's a good thing. Seriously; it really is. That will be a huge change from what we've seen from 'W'. Plus, he looks black (you can't honestly call him black anymore than you can call him white) and he will (hopefully) be a good hero image for thousands of young and impressionable black kids. And that truly is important. But I have many questions.

Does Obama really believe in distribution of wealth? Then why didn't he share his campaign money with McCain? What's he gonna do with those millions of dollars he has raised for the campaign? Will you or I see any of that dough? Can you really tax a country back to prosperity? Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?

Alas, I do not see him as having the answers to our dilemmas. A vote for B.O. is a vote for what you (desperately) hope he'll do for you in the future; but it's certainly not based on what he has already done for you or anyone else in the past.

Being pragmatic, I know my pick won't win, but I still had to vote for the one guy out of all the candidates who has actually done a tremendous amount of good in his career for a broad spectrum of Americans. I picked the guy who hasn't pandered to special interest groups. I picked the guy who truly is a maverick and who truly does know how to get things done. I picked the guy who understands the situation in the middle east better than the rest and who speaks the language fluently. I picked the guy with no chance of winning: Ralph Nader.

Please visit www.votenader.org.

And in case you're saying I've wasted my vote, I would say, "Bully." Honestly, I'm not sure I know what that means, but really I haven't wasted my vote. I voted for the candidate I believe in and that's what voting is all about.

So there you have it: I own a Mac and I vote!